Leaders often make the common mistake of trying to lead others before developing relationships with them.
As you prepare to develop other people, take time to get to know each other.
Ask them to share their story with you—their journey so far.
Find out what makes them tick, their strengths and weaknesses, their temperaments.
And spend some time with them outside the environment where you typically see them.
If you work together, then play sports together. If you know each other from church, meet with them at their workplace. If you go to school together, then spend some time together at home.
You can even use this principle with your family.
If you spend time with your children outside your everyday environment, you’ll learn a lot more about them. It will develop your relationship in ways it hasn’t before, and it will help you grow
Targeting moves a man beyond himself
Right is the normal and upright position, the way the Creator formed us to live. A man who is Living Right keeps himself Right by helping other men to Get Right and stay that way. By hauling Survivors into his boat (at least for a season) and helping Sad Clowns flip their boats into the upright position, the HIM reinforces the Guardrails that protect his own boat from capsizing.
The Joy of Serving by seeking Advantage for others bolsters a HIM’s commitment to consistently and deliberately place himself behind his Creator and Community—what F3 calls Living Third. It results in the type of spiritual awakening that both inspires a recovering alcoholic to carry the message of AA to other alcoholics and enables him to continue practicing its principles in his own affairs. By focusing on the sobriety of other men, the alcoholic finds his own sobriety is easier to maintain.
In this way, the Targeting is akin to the 12th Step of AA. It is what moves a man beyond himself to what Maslow described as the very highest and most inclusive or holistic levels of human consciousness. It is what Christ called the greater love, the laying down of one’s life for his friends.
To Target is to give the greatest gift a man can provide, the freedom to move beyond himself into his High Impact Zone for it is only that he will find true Joy.
2 Timothy 2:15
Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.
For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age,
1 John 1:7
But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin
“You cannot do a kindness too soon because you never know how soon it will be too late.”
–Ralph Waldo Emerson
Leaders Leading Leaders
“It is better to look at the sky than live there.”—Breakfast at Tiffany’s by Truman Capote